Guys, trust us on one thing: When it comes to sending text messages, most of you don't know what you're doing. I'm sorry. We either have no idea what you're talking about, your spelling is at the level of a second-grader, or the jokes are just not translating. So...call us, maybe? We know you're puzzled. You perfectly executed a one-word, one-finger response in less than 5 seconds while barely having to avert your eyes from Game of Thrones last week! It was so efficient: But, sweetie, there's no character count in text messages. That's Twitter :( We want to try and explain to you what it is your text messages are missing. Remember that time we didn't talk for two days and then you texted this: And in your head you were all like: But we were over here reading it like: Well, that's because your shit was not romantic. If Romeo spoke to Juliet like that, she would have been like, "Get off my property," and THE STORY WOULD HAVE ENDED THERE. We have to fix this. As women, here's what we'd like to see from you: 1. Excitement. Don't play it too cool for too long. 2. Full