In the classroom the next day, Joe gave his example first, “My dad is a farmer and we have chickens. One day we were taking lots of eggs to the market in a basket on the front seat of the truck when we hit a big bump in the road. The basket fell off the seat and all the eggs broke.” The moral...

In a 4 story building there lived 4 people: On the 1st floor lived a cop On the 2nd floor lived a thief On the 3rd floor lived a blind man On...

His daughter has been pursuing the career of an influencer, and it has begun to take a toll on the people around her.

A husband and wife decided to go on a diet together to shed a few pounds before their vacation. They agreed to encourage each other and stick to their diet plan. A week later, the husband noticed that his wife was sneaking into the kitchen late at night. He caught her red-handed, devouring a big

Ole, while not a brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist. His fame grew…and soon people from all over the country were coming to Minnesota to have portraits done. One day, a...

Once upon a time, there was a female brain cell which, by mistake, happened to end up in a man’s head. She looked around nervously, but it was all empty and quiet....

A beautiful young woman walks in and sits down at the table next to him. He decides that because she’s wearing a uniform, she’s probably an off-duty Flight Attendant. So he decides to have a go at picking her up by identifying the airline she flies for, thereby impressing her greatly. He...

An angel appears in a puff of smoke to a man and says to him, “Because you have lived a good and virtuous life, I can offer you a gift: you can...

He asks him what happened. His friends says, “Well I was in church and...” The man interrupts “Church! How do you get hurt in church?” The friend continues, “Well, I was sitting behind this woman Angelina, and after a while, what with all the standing, sitting and kneeling, I noticed she...

A young school teacher ran into a friend she hadn’t seen since they were teenagers. With eyes aglow, the school teacher said to her friend, “Guess what? Since last we saw one...

A young man was walking along one of Southern California’s sandy beaches with his surf board. He suddenly spots this bottle which has recently washed up on the beach. It’s obvious it’s been tossed around for a long time. He picks up the bottle and notices that it still has the cork intact. So...

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow’s final exam. ‘Now class, I won’t tolerate […]

FUNNY %

Woman expects friends who are taking their child on their group vacation to pay more for accommodation, gets accused of "burdening them financially."

One day a letter came to his desk, addressed, in shaky handwriting, to God. He thought, “I better open this one and see what it’s all about.” So he opened it and it read: “Dear God, I am an 83-year-old widow living on a very small pension. Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had a hundred...

The daughter of a wealthy movie producer was asked at school to write a story about a poor family. Her essay began: “Once upon a time there was a poor family. The...

The devil decides to pay them a visit, so he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they’re happy. They tell him, “Well, we’re so sick of the cold where we’re from, and this place is nice and toasty.” The devil, annoyed, storms away and goes to...

If he didn’t speak for two years, the following year he could speak two words and so on. One day, he fell in love with a beautiful lady. He refrained from speaking for two whole years so he could call her “my darling.” But then he wanted to tell her he loved her, so he waited three more...

When God created the donkey, he said:"You’ll work day and night, and you’ll carry in your back heavy baggage.You’ll eat grass and you’ll have low IQ.You’ll be living for 50 years.""But my God, 50 years is a lot of time for that kind of life! Give me only 30." And so it happened.

A hunter kills and eats a bald eagle, and is arrested for violating the Endangered Species Act. He pleads guilty, and throws himself on the mercy of the court. “Your Honor,” the...

Funny Joke Image: Funny Blonde Joke.

Facebook | Check my tees store for tshirts :)

There was a man who had worked all of his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money. Just before he died,...

The Dean from the University of Northern Colorado was a victim of a hit and run. He was just getting to his feet when a policeman ran up to help. “My mother-in-law...

A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked, “Is my time up?...

The following day, the teacher asked for the first volunteer to tell their story. Little Suzy raised her hand, “My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew...

After a number of drinks, they agree to go back to his place. The body builder takes off his shirt, and while doing so, he exclaims, “Boom!” The blonde says, “What a great chest you have!” He tells her, “That’s 100 lbs of dynamite, baby!” He then rips off his pants, once again yelling...

… would open her front door, stand on the porch and scream, “Praise the Lord.”This infuriated her atheist neighbor who would always make sure to counter back, “There is no Lord.”One m.. #funny, #joke, #humor

%

On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Susan went straight to her grandparent’s house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her. When she asked how her...

Subject: Students’ rights during examinations Here is a true story someone found regarding exams at Cambridge University. It seems that during an examination one day a bright young student popped up and...

An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the priest beside her, “Father, may I ask a favor?” “Of course child. What may I do for you?” “Well, I bought...

Larry, an avid hunter from Mississippi, walked into the local bar one evening and bragged to everyone about his hunting skills. Larry was undoubtedly a good shot, something all the locals knew. However, on this evening, there was a hunter from out of state in the bar. He told Larry, “If...

Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the head on a man’s penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two years and cost over 1.2 million pounds. The study concluded that the reason the head of a man’s penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the man with...

... and every year Buddy would say, ‘Edna, I’d like to ride in that helicopter’ Edna always replied, ‘I know Buddy, but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks’ One year Buddy and Edna went to the fair, and Buddy said, ‘Edna, I’m 85 years old. If I don’t ride...