A preacher is buying a parrot.“Are you sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?” asked the preacher.“Oh absolutely #funny, #joke, #humor
A man went to a seafood restaurant and ordered a seafood platter. When the dish arrived, he noticed something unusual. He called the waiter and said, "This fish is labeled as 'piranha,' but it looks like a normal fish." The waiter replied, "Ah, yes, that's our 'Piranha Surprise' – it surprises you by not eating
The young wife went into labor while her husband was overseas serving in the war.The next day he got the news that his wife had delivered twins.He got to a phone and called her right .. #funny, #joke, #humor
John and Mary were homeowners who decided to tackle some home improvement projects themselves. One weekend, they decided to paint their living room. John said, "I'll take care of the walls, and you can paint the ceiling." Mary agreed, and they got to work. A few hours later, John called Mary over to admire his
When they are handing out rifles, he is at the back of the line and they run out just before they get to him.The Sergeant gives him a stick and tells him to just pretend it’s a rifle... #funny, #joke, #humor
A honeymooning couple had purchased a talking parrot and taken it to their room,where much to the groom’s annoyance, the bird kept up a running commentary on their love making.Finally.. #funny, #joke, #humor
One is a member of the Gestapo. One is an Imperial Japanese officer. And one is a Fascist Italian Commander.They are all sitting in their holding cell discussing what they are going to do .. #funny, #joke, #humor
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Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was.When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen.He went back into the bar, handily fl.. #funny, #joke, #humor
A businessman was in big troubleHe had put everything into his business, and now it was failing.It was so bad he was even contemplating suicide #funny, #joke, #humor
So, one night he took her along with him.“What’ll you have?” he asked.“Oh, I don’t know #funny, #joke, #humor
He is in charge of the copying of holy texts. He notices that all of the monks are copying copies of their sacred texts.He goes to the head monk, “If there is an error in one of the copies, .. #funny, #joke, #humor
A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu.“I'm sorry, sir, but I am blind and can't read the .. #funny, #joke, #humor
An attorney telephoned the governor just after midnight, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of utmost urgency.An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor.“So, what.. #funny, #joke, #humor
What’s better than a hilarious joke? A hilarious joke that’s filled with smut and innuendo, of course. And have we got some great dirty jokes for you.From naughty gags to close-to-the-knuckle toilet humor, look no further. Short rude jokes, jokes, chat-up lines, Rude knock-knock jokes.
An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly. The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing." The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."
All tests came back looking good, and the doctor sits down to discuss the results with him.“Well, Eric, physiologically everything looks good. How are you doing emotionally and mentally? A.. #funny, #joke, #humor
In a city park stood two statues, one female and the other maleThese two statues faced each other for many years.Early one morning, an angel appeared before the statues and said, Sin.. #funny, #joke, #humor
During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asks the students…“Students, If you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to .. #funny, #joke, #humor
A man passing by sees this message advertised at the entrance, and believes this to be a load of rubbish, but decides to try it out anyway.He enters and a waiter takes him to a table... #funny, #joke, #humor
By the time a Marine pulled into a little town, every hotel room was takenYou've got to have a room somewhere, he pleadedOr just a bed, I don't care where. #funny, #joke, #humor
We can't help but wonder why these rules had to be created in the first place
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When it was clear that Bertha was dying, Betty visited her every day.One day Betty said, “Bertha, we both loved playing softball all our lives, and we played all through high school. Please.. #funny, #joke, #humor
A rich millionaire decides to throw a massive party for his 50th birthday.So during this party he grabs the microphone and he announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion h.. #funny, #joke, #humor
Anxious for his first investigation he was a bit perturbed when he was assigned to audit a Rabbi.Looking over the books and taxes was pretty straightforward and the Rabbi was clearly very fr.. #funny, #joke, #humor
The astonished woman replies, “I beg your pardon, Sir. I must have misunderstood youWhat did you say?”“Listen up, damn it #funny, #joke, #humor
Why Aren't Our Friends This Creative When They Greet Us At The Airport
A man and his friend are in a bar enjoying some drinks. A gorilla is also drinking in the bar. One man walks over to the gorilla and punches it …
His daughter wanted to say a prayer before sleeping, so the father listened. “God bless mommy, God bless daddy, God bless Grandma, Good bye Grandpa” The father asked, “Why did you say good bye Grandpa?” The little girl said “I don’t know, it just seemed like the right thing to say.” The...
Why Aren't Our Friends This Creative When They Greet Us At The Airport
A guy is at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted, while StPeter is leafing through the big book to see if the guy is worthy of entering.Saint Peter goes through the book several t.. #funny, #joke, #humor
There is a accordion player driving home from a late night gigFeeling tired, he pulls into a local store for some coffee #funny, #joke, #humor
A young caveman walks up to the tribe’s elder shaman, looking irritated he asks, “How […]
A man was playing golf when he hit his ball into the woods. As he went to retrieve it, he stumbled upon a talking frog. The frog looked up at him and said, "Hey, I'm actually a beautiful princess, and if you kiss me, I'll turn back into a princess, and I'll grant you three
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I was strolling in the gardens of an insane asylum when I met a young man who was reading a philosophy book.His behavior and his evident good health made him stand out from the other inmates.. #story, #funny
A young caveman walks up to the tribe's elder shaman, looking irritatedHe asks, “How do we name our newborn babies?”The elder shaman is kinda busy, but the young boy insists to know, .. #funny, #joke, #humor
1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University.On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in t.. #funny, #joke, #humor
“You’ve got a rare disease and you’ve only got 6 months to live,” the doc tells him.The patient is incredulous and tells the doctor he’s going to get a second opinion.He finds another.. #funny, #joke, #humor
“Human beings are the only animals that stutter,” she said.A little girl raised her hand“I had a kitty-cat who stuttered.” #funny, #joke, #humor
“I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician,” his first friend said, taking a swig of his beer.“How's that?” his other friend asked.“Well, the other day I came home and .. #funny, #joke, #humor
A man walks into a bar and sees his friend sitting beside a 12-inch pianist. He says to his friend, That's amazing. How did you get that? The man pulls out a bottle and tells him to rub it and ma.. #funny, #joke, #humor
A boy is visiting his girlfriend’s home for the first time. He’s looking for a […] More
